Calling Dr. Jones

" Excuse me, I don't recall seeing your name on the invited list..."

"That's because my name is not on the list... I'm Dr. Diana Jones..."

"Would you be related to The Dr. Jones?"

"No, none relation whatsoever, and believe me...if someone in our family went around in a Hat and Whip, they'd be disavowed instantly..even if they did find the Lost Ark..."

That's the attitude you get when you mess with Dr. Diana Jones. She's not a Doctor yet, but with her experience she can out-doctor any PhD holder you know. Her feisty attitude is quite apparent. One would imagine with her size, she'd be a little more reserved, but she can take on any beast, at any time.

The French cultural attache, being the pompous person she is, even for a french, just decided to ignore the intruder and let her go about her day. She was embarrassed by a renowned group of Archaeologists who told her, any archaeological social function would not be complete without Dr. Jones being on the list.

Shes been on a lot of excavations for someone her age, and did work on quite interesting digs too. But if you want her resume you can ask her for it.

Diana is someone I have known for quite a while now. Despite both our busy schedules, we fall in and out of touch, but always pick up where we left off. Its always either discussing the Stargate conspiracy, something she thinks is out of a movie, but i always come up with considerable evidence that it just might be a little more than something out of a movie. Sometimes we just discuss issues she has in her profession, problems with pompous peers..She gives me the impression that everyone in the profession is pompous, from the French Cultural Attache (who isn't exactly a member of the profession) to a fellow graduate in her class who always ends up working on the same work she does work on.

She has a banged up 4x4 (would have said SUV to be trendy, but it doesn't have any utilities in it) that's constantly parked. As long as I have known her, I've been promised a ride..that ride is yet to happen.

Diana's appeal lies in her true understanding of what a friend is and should be. She never ceases to surprise me in how good a friend she can be. Shes also quite engaging in conversation, which is both pleasant and enlightening. She has a knack for comebacks too, for every time we meet, I end up quoting her on a statement she said, and with her consent I post it on my facebook profile, yes that's how good they are.

She's out in the middle of the desert now as we speak, no music, no TV , no Internet...just a tent and sticky desert flies like she once told me...I don't know when is she going to read this...but I'll just sing along with Bubblegum Pop band "Aqua" and say

Dr. Jones,

Jones...

Calling Dr. Jones,

Dr. Jones,

Dr. Jones ,

Wake up now!

Sophie's Choice

Tuesday 1pm :

A Group of young business professionals were seated in an upscale coffee shop where business execs working in the tower would normally spend their coffee break.

"Dude, you shoulda been there last night, Tanya was all over the place, It seems like you really turned her into a dating beast...."

"Man, Dont forget you really fucked her up in the head..."

The Culprit, seated with them just gleamed, enjoying his seconds of infamy....and all he did was act modestly. Between the four of them, all dressed in their sharp suits with not so sharp minds to match, they pursued and were reciprocally pursued by the hottest and most eligible girls, the town had to offer.

Then she walked in...their eyes all turned.

*enter the chorus of "there she goes" by The La*

Dressed in black pants pinstriped with a subtle yet effective charcoal grey, a White silk shirt and nice little black ballet shoes she turned eyes and heads. She had a black leather laptop bag and was entrenched in concentration in her BlackBerry which she was nestling with both hands at the center of her chest.

Whats funny is, she cant even tell she was turning heads.

Some women act like they can't tell. She actually can't.

She crosses the cafe and sits at the farthermost table. A small table in the far corner where she'd always sit.

A creature of routine.

Routine is good,

Routine is safe.

Okay maybe routine is not so good. She yearns to break it, it provides no excitment, and like all of us we need to be stimulated, reminded that we are still alive, that there is still more to us and more to our world than Manolo Blahniks, Black Berry Bold, Dolce & Gabbana and Christian Lacroix.

She sits and makes her usual order, and opens up a book she is currently reading,

Israeli contemporary literature,

At this point the Boys are all eyeing her, wondering how this one managed to slip away from them.

"What's her name man...we need her name"

"Dude, I know her..she was with me in University, she actually was good friends with that babe...Lara"

"No Shit?"

"Yeah...her name's Sophie...Sophie Monet"

Her Phone rings, Sophie answers in German. A few minutes later, it rings again...the call is in French

"Where does she work...?"

"She Works in that big telecom company.. Oxycom"

Tuesday 4pm:

She sits at her cubicle, writing up one of the many reports for the day. Her supervisor leans over and says:

"Sophie, Norfolk wants you in his office..."

normally, anyone would quiver and go wobbly at the knees at such a statement, Norfolk's time is very expensive, even if its a mere few minutes, so if Norfolk wants to invest his time with someone, guess it is quite important.

Norfolk: Sophie, I liked your last report, Good job...I want you to do the same on Algeria and Nigeria...

Sophie: Thank You.... will do it right away,

Norfolk: No,

Thank you!...and if you need anything, please let me know.

Tuesday 7pm :

Quiksilver Gym is quite spectacular, its more of a social club than it is a gym. An anomaly made at the expense and for the utility of Cairo's Seen and be Seen crowd, although everyone acts like they are merely there to stay fit or work out, theyre really there for matters on their social agendas before anything else. On her way in she bumps into one of the trainers :

Carmella Blackman: Sophieyyyy!!!

Sophie: Carmella, How are you? its been a while,

Carmella Blackman: yeah, since what? when we met up with King...

Sophie: yeah, I havent seen him in a while too...

Carmella Blackman: I didnt know you train here...be sure to try out my spinning class..its a blast!

Sophie: well yes i train here everyday, normally I'm here before work, to avoid the crowd, you know...but sure Ill be sure to pass by...I have to see you guys...lets meet up...yalla take care, Ciao

Up on a treadmill, next to two dolled up girls trying to set up the speed on an Elipse Runner, she puts her iPod on full blast, as if shes the only person in the room, and just finds herself....

Running...

care free...

leaving it all behind...

The girls look at her oddly, as if shes not doing the normal thing people should do at a gym. They exchange whispers on who she is, where have they seen her before, if theres any gossip to be exchanged about her.

What they don't really get, is that in reality they admire her...for they cant pull off what to her is nature, even if their life depended on it.

Tuesday 9:30pm :

She drives her inconspiciously colored Japanese car, listening to Omar Khayrat heading home, enjoying the view of the Nile, and being thankful that she is Egyptian. Despite her multi cutural background from School, Uni, and her affinity for Europe, It's her Egyptianhood that she relates to the most.

She looks at her BlackBerry, recalls the many social invitations she has turned down today and smiles. She just turns it off and drives faster, activating her voicemail which is already full of unanswered messages.

In a Honky Tonk, Down in Mexico

Dedicated To Colin;

"Mexico Boss? That's quite a long way from the courthouse isn't it?" Sid inquired...
" You bet your Dumb Ass it is Sid....now get your shit sorted out, I'm having you on a Bus tonight..."
To Sid, who's realm of both existence and awareness ended at the Courthouse at the edge of town, you could see the excitement oozing out of his pores.

A few hours later, Sid was at the Bus Station with a black gym bag that said "Rhee Bok" on both its sides in Blue. In the bag were wads of fresh 100 Dollar Bills....

A sudden shiver ran down his spine, when he remembered his Boss's instructions..
" You go find the lady, and you give her the money in the bag, all 1 Million Dollars of it , Its simple, now don't fuck it up..."
Sid's Boss was a barrel of a man. he was round, truly round, irrespective of whichever angle you are looking at him from. He'd Wheeze with the slightest of movement, yet was always impeccably dressed, with an eccentric sense of style that would dub him overdressed or flashy for nearly every occasion. He was a good man at heart, just hid behind a rude and ruthless behavior.. he was a lowlife attorney spending his career on small odd jobs awaiting his big break. Barely worth mentioning on the Industry's level, one of those lawyers who start off as nobody's and retire as nobody's save their directly surrounding environment, who'd semi deify him, put him on a pedestal and liken him to legend.
He always cursed in every sentence, it was part of the external demeanor, he tried acting tough, but he had a big heart. Take Sid for example, he is quite incompetent, however The Boss, being the bottom line whats in it for me type, could never find it in him to fire the simpleton. As incompetent as Sid was, The Boss knew he's stupid enough to do something foolish... Simpeltons are loyal, merely because they are too stupid to be ambitious, That's why out of all the grunts The Boss had, Sid was his first and only choice.

As the Bus cruised the road close to El Paso...Sid was sitting on chair 32 B, nestling the Rhee Bok gym bag on his lap, with his eyes, along with the drivers, the only eyes wide awake. You can tell he was excited, he actually for the first time in a while, felt like he was doing something useful for a change. He was humming Paul Anka's cover of Smells like teen spirit,
He felt good
He felt useful...
Tonight he would sleep a satisfied man, not in his bed, but in chair 32 B on the 7682 Bus.
I've never slept on the 7682 Bus before, so i wouldnt know how comfortable it is to sleep on, but you can tell from Sid's groggy face the following morning that the fantastic dreams of grandeur he had on the trip wouldnt make the sleep any more pleasurable.
The man genuinely seemed to be in pain. Mostly at the neck cause he rubbed it whenever he remembered.
After a few hundred meters on foot away from the station his black Hush Puppies were already a light beige from the clay like dust on the ground streched for as far as the eye could see. As he walked further and further up the road, he noticed the surroundings are becoming more and more desolate. He wondered why would someone 1 Million dollars rich would live in such a place, The woman can definetly afford to live somewhere more accessible.
His mind started asking many questions. What is this money? did a rich relative of her die and this is her inheritence? did she invest in a rewarding scheme? if so, he wouldn't mind a million dollars for himself as well.
"What would I do with a million dollars?" he thought.
Then, out of nowhere, popped the most wicked thought Sid's mind ever concieved, accompanied with the most hideous grin his mouth could conjure.
" Why dont I skip with the money?"
The excitement following that thought overwhelmed him. He was almost going to explode in joy, not from the result of the thought more than the fact that his simple mind can come up with such an ingenius idea.
The shortly created thought would have to go dormant now, for his simple surroundings of dust, sun and dry weather were intruded by a Golaith of a Black 18-wheeler. He finally could embody salvation.
He waved frantically at the truck, hoping for it to stop.
It did...
creaked violently to a halt, as if its momentum awakened abruptly and in protest, from a comfortable slumber.
The Passenger door opened, revealing a tall and built man, with black wavy hair in the drivers seat.
It was quite odd for a truck driver to be dressed in a black suit and tie, and wearing black Ray Ban Wayfarers, he looked like one of the Blues Brothers but without the hat, and he had blood stains on his right cuff and spatter of it on his collar.
"It's not mine" he said, "get in"
after he got in, he thought it would be nice to engage in small talk, to break the ice.
" when you said its not mine sir...were you referring to the truck or the blood...?" " Oh...Both actually.." he said in a friendly yet very raspy drawly voice. "But dont worry, neither owner are gonna be looking for us...the name's Bud..." pleased to meet you sir..I'm Sid..."
"Kid, I got a name, i just told you what it is, dont call me Sir..."
"Okay Sir...sorry I meant Bud..."
Bud smiled..quite an attractive smile for someone with his demeanor.. " so kid, where you headed with that Rhee Bok bag?"

A couple of towns down, with sunset just a couple of hours away, Bud realized they could both use a drink. They parked in a makeshift parking lot on the side which had a roadhouse overlooking it.. an old banged up pickup and a dusty American muscle car were parked outside. With an abundance of space, Bud just parked right in the middle, and they both went in to the Mexican watering hole.
To Sid's surprise, the place inside reminded him of home, only dirtier and with more eccentric people. The juke box in the corner was playing "Stuck in the Middle with You" by Steelers Wheel and Bud did the impromptu dance Mr. Blonde did when it was playing in Tarantino's Reservoir Dogs..it was only then that Sid realized that Bud really resembled Michael Madsen in that movie...heck Bud is probably Michael Madsen's twin brother.

They both approached the Bar, Bud motioned to the bar tender for a drink. Sid, then innocently said I'll have a beer...
The bartender chuckled, so did Bud...turns out they only serve Tequila in this place, and all other places like it. Tequila straight outta a dirty unlabelled bottle. only God and the maker of the bottle would know whats in it.
After downing a straight up shot, Sid felt wobbly at the toes and ears. Bud, went for another, and did another Mr. Blonde Swirl...
As Steelers Wheel gave the microphone to James Brown for the Payback, all three mens' attention was diverted to the pool table across the room when a woman giggling could be heard. Oh and what a sight.

Two Women, both tall, one Blonde, one Brunette..both identically dressed in tight black pants, black heels and black tops with sleeves. The Brunette was the one laughing..she sounded alot nicer than she looked. As for the Blonde, well that was compeletly another story.

She was a tall fair skinned woman with dirty blonde hair , and a green left eye with a subtle yet effective beauty spot a few decimeters below. The right one was covered in a black velvet eye patch, with clear white stiches at the seams, probably a designer thing. She had nothing else that was familiar about her face to be described, other than probably she'd remind you of Yasmine Bleeth. She held two black eightballs in her right hand..her left hand cupped her mouth and she called:

"Hey Joe..Can i take these two balls and hang them from my windshield mirror?"
Joe, who was wearing a Red Bandana replied after brief thought saying..." Chica, anything in this place is for you... but you know the gringos might wanna play pool.."
She then, quite innocently turned her face to the man in the suit and the emo looking simpleton by his side.
"would you guys mind?"

Bud approached her, paused, and between the intervals of the beats in the background song...and right before the Godfather of Soul unleashed one of his Historical wails, he said...
"Matter of fact...i would... So what's your name Hot Stuff...and what happened to your eye?"

The Girl was infuriated, She knows its quite a curiousity to everyone who sees it, but at least they are decent enough to act like it's not there...sometimes, she gets confused whether they are staring at the eyepatch and imagining what ugly sight could possibly lie beneath it, or are they merely staring at her drop dead gorgeous features and figure.

" None, of your Goddamn Business Asshole..."
" yeah, but at least this asshole still has both eyes..."
in less than an instant, her knee was heading for his groin, afterwhich she intended to crash her heel into the top of his foot...
She missed, as he dodged backwards butt first..his right hand grabbing her left arm, and in less than an instant, twisting her arm to reel her into his torso...
He held her close to his chest, whispered into her ear..."You gonna bark all day lil doggie...or you gonna bite?"

He didnt have enough time to gleam in victory, to celebrate this very cinematic moment of his life, for in less than a minute, a tall dark man in black with a guitar case walked in, followed by a short saucy young latina woman with a face that meant business which was contrasted with her black polka dotted white dress..she was a few steps behind the man with the guitar case...he inevitably stopped before she did, the moment she did...she asked the man in the guitar case whats wrong..
he said..."everything..."
With that uttered, they hailed the entire place with gunfire...
Sid hid for a corner and left the bag by the bar...
Joe the bartender ducked behind the counter and came out with a shotgun in his hand..started firing at the Mariachi and his Bella Donna, the ugly brunette in black somersaulted on the ground towards the pool table for cover, firing from two silver pistols that popped outta nowhere...
The only thought running in poor Sids head was why was everyone carrying guns...is this common here in Mexico? if so, then why didnt his boss tell him?
He suddenly remembered a parody movie he used to watch as a child, it was called Viva Zalata, where Fouad el Mohandes played an outlaw cowboy in Texico called Zalata...
Wahiba dih...Teb2a your mother!
nope, that was from another Fouad el Mohandes movie...Akhtar Ragol fel 3alam...
At that moment, he really did wish he was...
Actually last man or woman standing in this Gunfight, would respectably earn the title.
When the Gunshots and Cordite settled, Sid came out of his hiding place to review the casualties, both to property and human life..
The Ugly Brunette was slumped on the pool table...lifeless..riddled with bullets from an automatic rifle.
Joe now his bald patch naked after his red bandana fell off , was bleeding profusely at the shoulder, and gasping for Cordite free air...and in the middle of gasps he was cursing in the local dialect, something that involved alot of hookers and mothers..
Bud was donning his friendly smile, playing it cool..pulled his Wayfarers from his breast pocket and slid them on his nose. The one eyed blonde, lets simply call her Elle, was running for the door to take a look at the bandits who offed her pool playing fashion twin.
" hey Blues Brother, they took your friend's Rhee Bok Bag"
Sid upon hearing that just cried like a baby...

They sat down, and talked, each had his own explaining to do

Bud

Bud: the guy is a legend, they call him El Mariachi..sometimes they merely refer to him as El...he takes hits off any Cartel, I made a coupla Medellins ( members of the Medellin Cartel) unhappy by offing one of their rookies...guess this hit was in retribution..That Truck out there is his..
Elle: why'd you off em
Bud: nobody disses the King...
Elle: your boss?
Bud: ELVIS...

Elle

Elle: we were here doing work...we were doing a first time job for a big client, Damien King, we are supposed to track down a woman hiding from the FBI, since they don't have jurisdiction over here and they dont want to involve the Mexican Federales the FBI asks people like King to bring these fugitives back across the border...
Bud: Damien King is an Asshole...
Elle: Hey, i thought you said nobody disses the King.

Sid

Sid: I work for a guy, who works for a guy who works for Rankin Fitch, was supposed to deliver that bag to a woman, codenamed Dirty Diana...
Elle: Shit, thats who i was supposed to bring in?
Sid: why? what did she do?
Elle: from what it looks like she is one dangerous woman...She used to be an analyst at the Department of Defense, some techie that spent most of her day looking at screens, screens that displayed very sensitive infromation. She got greedy, guess it had something to do with an abusive husband, so she decided to sell the secrets..
Sid: to the Russians?
Elle: you really are pathetic Sid, The Russians are our friends now...she's selling it to the Arabs..
Bud: But i thought the Arabs were our friends...those Jews are doing a good job with the governments in the area,
Elle: not government, Hizbollah...
Sid: I need to get that bag back, can you guys help me?
Bud: I gotta plan that would make everyone happy... how do we split 1 Mil three ways..?
Elle: heck i want no money...i just wanna get the woman back...
Bud: don't worry, we'll get your woman...
Joe: AHEM! out of all you Gringos, who the Puta! you think needs the money most?

Joe (now donning a purple Sash, and a Black Mustache)

Joe: Why do you Gringos gotta come do your dirty business south of the border? why cant you go mess up a roadhouse in texas, I mean up there you still can shoot your pistoleros..2nd ammendment Merda...we dont have no Second Ammendment here, you know what, you are all pathetic...you all work for someone, whos doing something for someone, you are all a bunch of fuckin assholes, you dont got the guts to be what you wanna be...ME? This is my Cantina...My Rules, nobody tells me what to do, I work for myself, Im the most honorable out of all of you, i sit down on my pianoh stool, play the blues pianoh, this is the closest to Americana i wanna get... get out of here... all of you...take that dead chiquita off my pool table too get out...
he reaches for his shotgun, and cocks a cartridge into the barrel, the sound of which turns the mood from somewhat comedic, to serious...funnily enough, they've all just been out of a gunfight..but his anger wasn't a matter to take lightly...If i learnt anything during my time in mexico, is never mess with an angry Mexican.
get out...
(BANG!)
GET OUT!
(bang!)
I dont want your beezness here... It has no place... yalla...yalla...barra barra....ya Kelab!!!

They walked out gracefully, and headed to Elle's Muscle car...
"okay, Im curious Elle, how would a pretty thing like you get a nasty scar like that.."
"Abusive boyfriend with an Ego problem.."
"Is he still breathing?"
"well, not for long.."
"how you surviving?"
"I drink..."

The Windsor Hotel & Number 3 Happiness High Lane

They were staking him out,

The Hotel said the guy fitting the description rented out the room four days ago under the name of "Feldman"

It could be him.

They always had good conversation on stakeouts...dont ask why, cause for in other situations, these two couldnt keep a convo flowing between them with guns to their heads.

"Hows the wife?"

"she nags.."

"Kids?"

"expensive.."

"Dog?"

"hes getting old, we are going to have to put him to sleep soon..."

"would ask about job, but i can already see.."

"funny you should ask.."

"You know what you need...you need a blowjob"

"not from you i presume..."

"yeah yeah...you should try your mother...she was great last weekend.."

She was fidgeting with her keys in the car door...turns out Germaine was parked right next to her...

"Kelly...!~!"

"Jem...how are you?"

"I'm fine, we havent seen you at the club for a while, I hope everything is okay?"

"Oh well, you know the ups and downs..."

"Why whats wrong..is it Sid?"

"hes just going through a rough time, i guess its work..."

"Is he back to gambling?"

"yes...he even maxed out half of our savings..., he even cant get the car he promised Jack for his 16th birthday, and hes avoiding it ..I tried confronting him and i even offered to give him some of my own savings for a downpayment, and he just snapped at me, I know its out of pride...and i tell him there shouldnt be any between us. He just left the house and came back when i was asleep."

" he might just be going through a rough time at work, being a police detective can be very stressful, even for someone at his rank".

" Well i hope it might just be the job, but i feel he is falling apart, Hooch..his bloodhound is sick too..i think its taking a toll on him..."

"The poor thing!..., Oh well if you need anything Kelly..I am here for you..."