20 Questions

Nope, not the game, these are 20 questions i am truly sick and tired of hearing:

Q1: Are you Happy?
A: I guess
What I really mean: You don't see me jumping off a bridge and leaving a fucking note now do you?

Q2: Whats new?
A: Not much...
What I really mean: You'd be truly pathetic if I happen to be your source of current events.

Q3: Wa7eshni ya man, inta Ghatsan feen?
A: mafeesh ya 3am, enta elli ghatsan
What I really mean: Well why dont you reach for your phone and call me every once in a while you hypocritical fuck!!!

Q4: Netsharaf be 2esm 7adretak?
A: ....Osiris Kane
What I really mean: ana mesh gay 2at3arraf ya K*s Om*k khalasni...

Q5: *said while you are walking into a place* aiwa ya Ostaz?
A: Na3am....
What I really mean: *in Clint Eastwood mode* go ahead, make my day

Q6: Are you a player?
A: huh?
What I really mean: oh, so you are one of them structured girls...I guess I'm wasting my time

Q7: Do you still think of me / have feelings for me?
A: of course i do...
What I really mean: look, I'm not exactly hot shit...move on, get a life...find a guy that'll make you forget i ever even existed...do you want Brad Pitts number?

Q8: Wow, you are a Lawyer? do you like stand in front of a judge and shit?
A: erm...yeah
What I really mean: What the Fuck? do you ever ask a Doctor does he open up patients and write prescriptions? i mean... there are millions of us out there...

Q9: wow, you cook?
A: i have to eat you know...
What I really mean: Walk into any Kitchen of any fucking place that serves food...you'll find a man sweating over a stove, so seriously..don't be impressed.

Q10: mesh nawi tetgawez?
A: leeh bas ya 3am...?
What I really mean: oh and end up like you? no thanks...oh and btw, if i ever do, you wont be invited to the wedding

Q11: Does this make me look fat?
A: yes
What I really mean: You wont get a compliment outta me, so go fish somewhere else.

Q12: Whats wrong? *said generally*
A: nothing its okay....
What I really mean: Its none of your business

Q13: Whats wrong? *said specifically*
A: nothing, its okay...
What I really mean: Ask yourself, see where you fucked up...and thats exactly whats wrong

Q14: How do you represent someone who you know is guilty?
A: look, its not my job to make him get away with something he's done, my job is to help the judge have a clear picture of his side of the story, so that he gets what he deserves, its never about winning or losing, if he gets 7 years, and he deserves 3...then i should find something better to do, if he deserves 7 and gets 3, then im an accomplice, and that doesnt make me feel in any way better. Guilty doesn't mean he still doesn't have a right to get the best defense he can afford. but beleive me he aint paying his way outta murder. This isnt John Grisham okay, this is real life, its less controversial and less exciting and most certainly less dramatic...although we wish it weren't
What I really mean: Fuck You!

Q15: We eeh tani?
A: ...............
What I really mean: say something for the love of God

Q16: Are you pissed?
A:....Eshta, Peace......
What I really mean: You fucked up...you know it, now fix it...

Q17: How was your day?
A: not bad...
What I really mean: wow, am I really that boring?

Q18: How was last night?
A: Zareef
What I really mean: hehehe....you have no idea....!

Q19: Inta mesa7eb?
A: I don't date....
What I really mean: It's none of your business...as far as you are concerned, my personal life is totally non-existent...

Q20: Any plans for tonight?
A: No, Call me...lets do something...
What I really mean: No, Call me...lets do something...